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A few months ago, I was with my mother for a doctors appointment. The doctor said to her, “You can’t drive anymore, I have to notify the state”. A second later I asked the doctor what stage is she in dementia? Her doctor had zero problem being direct. It took the burden off of me. Re: her driving and keeping an old car
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Lorraine12 Feb 2019
Thankyou for your reply Erin60 so you agree that being streight forward is the best thing to do I think so to how else can I explain to her why shes soooo forgetful& confused....I just wanted other peoples opinion TY
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Lorraine12, it all depends on how your Aunt would react being told she has Alzheimers.

For my Dad [94], any time he complained that he couldn't remember someone's name or an event, I would tell him I have that same issue [senior myself]. Then I said that since we are older we have a lot to remember, those filing cabinets in our brain are jammed pack, so it takes time to find what we want to remember. He got a chuckle out of that, and that helped calm him.

I never told my Dad he had dementia. That would just bring up memories of when his older relatives were "senile", how they acted, and how people around them would act. I didn't want him to relate that to himself.
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Lorraine, you want to explain it but you may realize she will not retain that information and forget what you have said. Thus, her confusion will continue and you may get frustrated trying to explain it in a way that sticks. Experiencing moments of sadness repeatedly when you see she has just realized she has a devastating diagnosis is a difficult routine. You may find the right answer by trying a few responses. Sometimes the best answer is what is less stressful for both of you. I really like the "filing cabinet" response suggested by frequentflyer.
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GingerMay& Frequentflyer ; Thanks you are right its useless trying to explain the Alzheimer's disease to her , she gets sundowners everyday at around 2or3 pm it starts and if any one new is around her she really really freaks out , I try to keep an ear and eye so Hopefully I can stop it but the confusion causes her to be so mad I tell you I kinda get nervous sometimes it takes longer and longer for the spells to subside Do you think Maybe I should ignor it all together like walk away for a few minuets ? I appreciate all of your ideas and insight Alzheimer's disease is so difficult ...
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